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07/01/2011

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A man can fail many times, but he isn't a failure until he begins to blame somebody else.

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If we ask "What salary are you looking for?" say you're flexible, or say it depends on the responsibilities of the job. Try not to name a salary unless we really push you, because that gives us a leg up in the negotiating.

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I love this 'you are allowed' concept of rules.

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I very much agreeights. Hope that more could write such a good word!

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There is energy in the quality of your connection. My publication is based around removing the terms from our vocabularies so we can be more immediate and extra ordinary about what we want.

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Choose a location that is on a main street, easy to get to, and so people can see you washing cars from the street.

ChristinaWyatt26

The home loans seem to be essential for people, which would like to ground their career. In fact, that is not really hard to get a short term loan.

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Victory won't come to me unless I go to it. ( M. Moore )

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Red Bottom Shoes must communicate my own thoughts in regards to the really like among Erika and also Darlene due to the fact these kinds of thoughts prevent my own coronary heart and also help make myself in short supply of air.

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It is not enough to do good; one must do it the right way. (John Morley, British statesman)

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Amazing story! At this time, as I struggle to instill these very morals in my own two children, I am painfully aware of the power this story holds. My heart aches for that family, yet at the same time, swells with pride at the contribution such a simple gesture of goodwill can bestow upon so many other lives.

Paul f

Wow. Simple yet powerful. Encourages people to say yes, instead of no. Create instead of destroy.

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Thanks for thinking outside the square.

Eric Goldman

Thanks Simon, another great PEACE of advice. Get it PEACE to keep things calm and focused on what can be done!

Lisa Alessi

Thanks Simon, I absolutely love your approach!

As someone who has lived by the mantra --"rules were meant to be broken" and "women who behave rarely make history," your rules really resonate with me.

It's a brilliant and unifying way to focusing on what you want.

Those are certainly rules I could live by and a great example for other organizations!

Bravo!

thevoiceofsue

Thanks for thinking outside the square. We can do anything we want to. Keep filling the glass. ;-)

CreidS

Reminds me of the old Nordstrom's employee handbook:

Welcome to Nordstrom
We're glad to have you with our Company. Our number one goal is to provide outstanding customer service. Set both your personal and professional goals high. We have great confidence in your ability to achieve them.

Nordstrom Rules: Rule #1: Use best judgment in all situations. There will be no additional rules.

Please feel free to ask your department manager, store manager, or division general manager any question at any time.

Lori Kane

Love this post, thanks. I study self-organizing groups (www.collectiveself.com) and wasn't fully aware of this "allowed list" idea until I read your blog post. But as I think about it, across all the groups I've studied so far this appears to happen naturally in self-aware self-organizing groups.

I model all my own behavior these days on what I experience as part of these amazing groups. For example, here's what I said earlier this week to two new members someone invited to join a consulting group I'm part of:

"Happy July everyone! For our new folks, here’s everything I can think of about this group right now:

• We’re awesome :-)
• Everybody in this group is a leader (unless you hate the word “leader” and then none of us are)
• Core members (people who attend and contribute regularly) invite others they personally know and consider awesome. They also schedule the meeting for other locations, including hosting in their homes. You don’t have to ask anyone’s permission to do this. You just have to recognize yourself as a core member.
• We come together for the purpose of helping each other evolve as consultants and as human beings. Bring your whole self, and no subject is off limits.
• To leave the group, ask a core member to remove your name from the monthly invite. To rejoin, ask a core member to be added back in.
• Unless otherwise scheduled, our monthly meeting is at Zeitgeist Coffee. This location is convenient for the current core members and will change as core members change.

Sounds like an allowed list to me! Thanks for putting this idea in my head. Will be on the lookout for this in future groups I study.

Lori

Gairy Smith

Good day! this is one of the most interested statement I have heard anyone said. I have always say to myself there are no rules telling us what to do, but rules telling us what not to do. We need to start making rules telling us what to do and we will see how creative our world would be. thanks, Simon

Monk51295

yup.. too much of our energy/time on defense. not enough on offense.. on living/doing/being.

a gentle seque into chaos.

love it Simon.. thank you.

Mark Horoszowski

GREAT article!!! I can't help but think about how great these would be in any organization. And if implemented, I think there are two more rules that would fit right in there: 1. You are encouraged to smile. 2. You are allowed to cheer for others and their accomishments.

Veda Horner

Hi Simon Those are my kind of rules... Thanks Simon

Maria Carlton

I love this 'you are allowed' concept of rules. In my home and in my business We have only two rules - be truthful, and respect each other. That's all. Result so far, as a single entreprenuerial mother I've raised 2 really great citizens (young men) and have a healthy business too. Less 'rules' and more common sense with simple values serving as guidelines has worked for us.

K

Because you believe in rule #4 ...

Today I visited 56-58 Am Großen Wansee (the house where the Wansee Conference took place and the Final Solution was planned). I connected a comment from the tour guide with your 2nd talk; the Milgram experiment example.

First, she said 3 million Jews were personally shot by soldiers who were considered psychologically normal. People who said they did not want to be "the coward" who left the group to carry out its "dirty work" alone (for example, in 1 case, 300 soldiers were given the option to leave without consequences and only 12 left).

BUT:

Zyklon B (the gas chambers) began to be used increasingly because the soldiers who performed the shootings? Couldn't handle it. It began to get to them, and it was EASIER for them to use the gas chambers, where they did not have to see or hear anything...

That is all.

Jeans

I worked at a summer camp where our rules were a "Can Do" list. With items like, "You can treat your fellow campers with respect." Worked great with the middle school and high school students we had for the summer.

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